Swimming Against the Tide of Reason


People always picture the North York Moors carpeted in deep purple heather but that only really happens for a few weeks in August. I prefer November, with  shades of brown and gold; from rufous bracken to bright yellow ochre larches, shedding drifts of needles,the smell of wood fires and approaching snow in the air. I’m enjoying the guilty pleasures of being at home, some seasonal introspection and preparing my nest for winter, yearning for a way to live even more simply.


The first snow came yesterday but didn’t last long, in fact it rained heavily the same night and yet again the tap water has turned muddy and grim, like taking a bath in a mug of stewed tea. It would be good if it worked like a kind of tanning bath but there’s always the fear that it’s been filtered through a dead pheasant or two…. yum.                                                                                                                               And so this week I’ve been catching up with chores neglected when I was out at work all day and trying not to panic about what I’ve done. It’s hard to panic properly when I still get butterflies of excitement looking out of the window in the morning and thinking how lucky I am to live here… but butterflies are silly ephemeral things and no use at all for paying the rent; stop fluttering about and make some sensible plans Kim!


So, yesterday I went to an interesting “Creative Conference” organised by Chrysalis Arts. I gave a lift to Jo from the gallery and it was actually so nice to chat and feel reassured that my name wasn’t entirely made of mud! The talk by artist and print maker Mark Hearld was hugely inspiring and I loved the fact that he had printing ink on his fingers and many tales of lucky breaks and fruitful collaborations. There were also workshops on crowd funding and online selling which left Jo and I full of ideas…I kept forgetting I didn’t work there anymore and need to apply those ideas to my future.


Since last week I feel like I’ve done so much and stretched time out … many doodles and scribbles, two blog posts, visits with friends I had almost lost touch with and a brief trip to the Lakes where my shoes leaked and I was moody …until the beauty of it all and the drizzle soaked into me and I snapped out of it. There was a moment in the guest house where I thought I was going to come to a sticky end… sneaking out of the bathroom with a stolen loo roll up my jumper (times are hard but don’t worry I haven’t turned to crime in general), I missed a step hidden in the vile psychedelic carpet and staggered about on the landing like John Cleese in Fawlty Towers, nearly falling headfirst down the stairs to land guiltily,  at the feet of the landlady. There is something unsettling about getting a mad attack of the giggles when you’re alone…especially with a loo roll up your jumper.
Anyway, the colours and the mist and the mountains and time to draw. Simple pleasures. Ostrich stance.


Meanwhile in the world of ART and CULTURE, I listened to Radio 3, Night Waves for the first time this week and enjoyed it very much…particularly the title “William Tillyer, Dr.Who and the Gettysburg Address” which sounds like a book I may try to write one day! Listening, I couldn’t help but wonder if I hadn’t inherited the stubborn desire to be a hermit ” in control of one’s own time” if not the artistic genius; I also wondered if I would soon be enjoying espresso and fine wine and feeling grown up now that I had taken the momentous step of turning the dial to 3. No, not yet,I will be back for Night Waves but I am now re-tuned to 6 Music and cursing the day I put my 1983 Bowie T-shirt in the charity shop bag as it’s “wear your old band t-shirt to work” day tomorrow and I’ve just seen one on  eBay for almost £100, drat!
Now I must leave you and attempt to keep to sensible hours and resist the urge to drink coffee at midnight.


Listening to:- “Swimming Against The Tide Of Reason – BBC Session 07/05/1986” by Len Bright Combo


5 responses to “Swimming Against the Tide of Reason

  1. LOVE the bear – quite magical. The bird is wonderful too.

    We did a webinar by the Design Trust last week (on pricing work) and it was excellent – it also made us feel energised and connected with other creatives.

    Im sure Im telling what you already know but Arts Council England has two excellent mailing lists (Arts Jobs and Arts News) which feature commissions and short term paid creative projects. So many of them are ‘up north’ so may be worth looking through to earn some money from your fantastic creativity.

  2. oh have you quit your job? Confused??? Did i miss a post?
    Anyway saw this today and thought of you

  3. thebeadybutterfly

    Such beautiful work and thoughtful intimate prose. Thank you x

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